Friday, August 28, 2020

                     SUMMER FUN, SWIMMING POOLS, AND FRIENDS 

Who was your best friend as a child? What did you do together? Are you still friends?
 
I asked these questions to the participants of the writing class I taught in Arizona last year. As always, their tales entertained all of us. Here is the piece I wrote and it’s another of my get-to-know-me-stories:

My friend, Bonnie, estimates we’ve known each other for sixty years. I say it’s closer to fifty-eight. I’m pretty sure our moms wouldn’t have let us play outside at four years old. Whatever our age, we’ve been friends for a very long time.
 
We lived in the same neighborhood and when our mothers let us, we’d play outside all day. One such day, Bonnie and I decided we needed a swimming pool in my backyard. I hurried inside and grabbed two spoons from the utensil drawer.
 
She and I got to work and we weren’t two spoonfuls in and my mom yelled out of the kitchen window, “Janetta, bring the spoons back in here. Bonnie, you go on home.” We listened and scurried in the direction she told us to go.
 
Through the years Bonnie and I kept in touch, but a strange thing happened to us in 2002. Of all the places Ray could get a job, he got one in Houston. The city where my friend and her family lived. Once again we lived near each other and made many more cherished memories, which included our husbands.
 
How about you? Do have a friendship (or friendships) in your life that’s stood the test of time? Tell me about them. You know I love to hear your stories.
 

WRITING NEWS:
I’m working diligently on my next project, but for right now mums the word on what it is about. Trust me, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when you find out what I’m up to. Or I hope you are. HA!!!
 

OTHER NEWS:
Please pray for the fires in Colorado, California, and all the other states experiencing them. Also, pray for safety for the people of the Gulf Coast with Hurricane Laura heading their way. Thanks!!!

 
Until next time…

Blessings!!!

Janetta Fudge Messmer - Author of Christian Comedy

“Turning Life Into Comedy”

Monday, July 27, 2020

Image result for July 4 Pictures Free

Hope you had a wonderful 4th of July. Thank you for sharing your mouse stories with me. I laughed at them but they creeped me out at the same time. HA!!! It’s amazing how a little creature can raise so much havoc and cause so much fear in human beings. Yikes!!!

 

No, I’m not going to talk about the pandemic, but the reason for the picture - I wanted to show how my hubby wears his mask when he’s eating. Sort of reminds me of a unicorn with a flat horn.

As you can see, Ray didn’t appear to care how he looked. He was enjoying a delicious crepe on our travels to Breckenridge for a few days with my cousins. And, as usual, wherever my hubby and I go, mayhem seems to follow us to our destination.

Image result for Free Picture of A Bear

This isn’t the actual bear, but it was obvious one visited while we’re at the cabin. My cousin (Jenny) had gone outside the first afternoon we were there. She came back in and said, “the door to the shed is open.”

My other cousin (Ann) replied, “I must not have gotten it shut all the way when I took the trash. The lock is a little tricky.”

Ray jumped into the conversation, “I’ll go check it out.”


After supper he ventured down to close the door and Jenny went with him. They came back inside and she was laughing. “While Ray walked down to the shed, he’s waving his arms. ‘Bear, if you’re in there, go away. I’m shutting the door.’”

Oh, how I wished she’d taken a video of Ray’s theatrics.

Fast forward to the next morning. After I got up, I heard Jenny and Ann outside on the back deck and I joined them. I don’t have one foot on the deck and my cousin said, “Take a look down at the shed.”

I glanced in the direction Jenny pointed and not four feet from the shed door (which was still closed) sat a white garbage bag. The contents of it were strung all over the ground. I stood in complete shock. THERE WAS A BEAR!!!

Ray came out on the porch, and Jenny instructed him to look at the sight below. For a solid fifteen seconds, my hubby’s mouth stood wide open. I’m sure, at that moment, all of us wondered how close he’d come to encountering the bear.


We’ll never know, but we know our time in Breckinridge was an adventure that we’ll talk (and laugh about) for years to come.

SIDE NOTE: Ann alerted her son (who owns the house) to tell him the bear news. He called and asked, “Is Ray packing?” Turned out when she VOICE texted him, the phrase “Ray shut the door.” came out as “Ray shot the door.” We all had a good laugh at the miscommunication.

Have you had an experience with a wild animal? I’d love to hear your stories.


WRITING NEWS:
The e-book of my latest release - Waltzing with a Grease Monkey - is .99 cents until July 31. Don't miss out!!! Here is the link for it: www.amzn.to/3hJfJAL

Until next time…

Blessings!!!

Janetta Fudge Messmer - Author of Christian Comedy
“Turning Life Into Comedy”

Tuesday, July 07, 2020

GETTING TO KNOW ME
 

Part of me wanted to touch on the current events in my newsletter, but since I write comedy I decided to do something different this month. I’m going to tell you a little bit about myself.

Yes, you can go to
www.janettafudgemessmer.com and read my biography, but it doesn’t give you the whole story of what makes me who I am - the behind-the-scenes Janetta.

Most of you know I taught a writing class in Arizona last fall. Each week I gave the attendees writing assignments they’d read to me the following week. I joined in with them on the homework. One question I posed to them: What are three of your greatest fears?

I’m positive I didn’t blink before I came up with my #1 fear. MICE! (And the reason for the Mickey and Minnie pic above). Here is the story I penned for class.

I’ve been told that they are more scared of me than I am of them. And knowing this doesn’t change my opinion of them. So you can imagine how thrilled I was when we found mice in one of the houses we lived in.


Unbeknownst to me, our home on Sedge Way was prime real estate because we backed up to an open field. Another lure to our home, we had a dog and never thought once about putting her food in a closed container.

That’s until Ray pulled out the fridge one day and we found the floor covered with dog food. I have to stop and talk about the size of said morsels and I ask you, how does a tiny mouse (or mice) transport something a sixty-pound dog eats?

Trust me, they can. And, Mickey and Minnie can also hide dog food inside of a couch. They dug a hole and stashed their winter buffet right next to where I sat every night to watch TV. The thought of them being there still creeps me out.

To get rid of them, we tried the old standby – cheese. When it didn’t work, we found our mice loved peanut butter. I don’t remember now how many we caught, but Ray was in charge of that part of the operation. All I know, I didn’t want those pesky varmints inside my house.

Oh, and about the dog food. We went out that afternoon and bought a trash can with a lid on it. Problem solved.

Did I mention I HATE MICE? And in my world, they don’t climb stairs either.


WRITING NEWS:
1) BLESSING BIRDS (Book #4 in the Early Birds series) is FREE 6/29 thru 7/3. Click on the link and get a copy.  www.amzn.to/2Xj66gW

2) The e-book of my latest release - Waltzing with a Grease Monkey - will be .99 cents July thru end of month. Here is the link for it: 
www.amzn.to/3hJfJAL
Until next time…
Blessings!!!

Janetta Fudge Messmer - Author of Christian Comedy
“Turning Life Into Comedy”

Wednesday, June 17, 2020

ON THE ROAD AGAIN...sort of!

  
     
WE'RE ON THE ROAD AGAIN…sort of. Actually, we left Arizona (finally) and are camped in Ft. Collins, Colorado for the summer. With everything going on in our world, we felt it best to find a stationary place for a few months.

And what better place than camping close to the mountains. When Ray’s not working at the campground, and I’m not writing or trying to organize our life, you’ll find us enjoying the beautifulness surrounding us.

That is when everything opens back up…whatever that will look like.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve had trouble concentrating since all this pandemic started. Usually, my unsettledness has to do with me listening to too much news, but not this time. Thirty minutes (or so) is my limit each evening because that’s all my psyche can take.

And another reason for my shortened TV time – I don’t want to put all my trust in people (media, government, science, etc.). Yes, they’re giving me much-needed information (and am thankful for it), but I find too much of it takes my eyes and heart off of the Lord.

I need to keep my focus on the Great Physician. The Bible tells us, “Do not be anxious for anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

When I pray, my worries about what might happen fade away. In its place is a calm assurance that all things will work out. It may not be how I would have orchestrated it, but He’s the One in charge – not me.

Not to talk politics, but trust me, you don’t want me to run this country. But then again…that’s something to think about. A comedian for President. Who needs foreign policy when they’re laughing because I’ve put a whoopee cushion on their seat?

Need I say more? Take care and stay safe. And more than anything else – pray and trust in the Lord.


WRITING NEWS:
If you didn't see last month's newsletter. The title of my new book is: Waltzing with a Grease Monkey (it will release July 1, 2020). Here is the book cover. I LOVE IT!!! Hope you do too. Let me know. 

Until next time…
Blessings!!!

Janetta Fudge Messmer - Author of Christian Comedy
“Turning Life Into Comedy”

 
            
Life is still a bit crazy, but I have some great news. I’ve picked the WINNERS from last month’s contest. For those who emailed me and gave me ideas for a title, thanks a bunch.

The winner of the $10 Amazon Gift Card is Laura B. And the winner of the $50 Amazon Gift Card is Linda A. She gave me the title for my newest book. It’s perfect!!! Congratulations to both of the winners!


Oh, and I almost forget to mention the title. It is: Waltzing with a Grease Monkey. And to excite you even more - here is the book cover. I LOVE IT!!! Hope you do too. Let me know.

By the way, your eyes are the first to see the masterpiece. I believe my publisher hit it out of the park (as she always does).
 
Other than picking winners for my contest, there’s not much excitement to report on our end. We’re still in Arizona. A few days ago, we took a drive and visited Lake Pleasant, just north of Phoenix (see pictures).                                                                                                                                                                                             



   
               
         



Other than staying at home, what have you done to pass the time in this quarantine? I finished editing my book, have played way too much on my tablet, read and took three (or more) walks per day. 
And this is the reason for the excessive walking. I’m eating way too much. Not just cinnamon rolls. This picture is an example. I forgot to take one of the gooey goodness. Our logic behind buying them - we’re helping keep small businesses alive during a rough time.

WRITING NEWS:
Since everything is closed down, or postponed, I will not find out in May if Pigtails and a Tool Belt is a Selah Award winner. The conference and awards banquet is slated to happen in November. I’ll let you know.

Blessings to everyone. Stay safe out there!!!


PS: I’ll leave you with a funny. Concerning last month’s contest, one of my readers suggested I send the winners toilet paper. If this goes on much longer, it might be necessary. HA!!!

Until next time…
Blessings!!!

Janetta

Tuesday, March 10, 2020

HELMETS - HEARTS - AND WHO KNEW


Okay, I know the last part of my title doesn’t start with an ‘H’ word, but humor me for a moment. :) 


Maggie is rooting for my team!


What about them Kansas City Chiefs? Wherever you live in the USA, you probably heard me screaming. Oh. My. Goodness. All I ask next year; can they win without causing my heart to skip more than one beat? Best Super Bowl ever. WOW!!! 

 

Happy Valentine’s Day. This year Ray and I are celebrating bigtime. We're going to WhatABurger for breakfast Valentine morning. I can't wait for their biscuits and gravy. Yum!

You know I love to hear your stories - tell me about one of your special Valentine’s Day gifts. For me, I still have a gift Ray bought me years ago. It’s a little pink bear and when you squeeze its tummy, it says, “You mean everything to me.” 


Now I'll explain the “Who Knew” in the title of my newsletter. The park we’re living in participates in a pool tournament. I signed up and never had a doubt I’d play on the B Team. I don’t know how, but I beat the three top contenders. Me and another lady played on the A Team. Who knew???

If the Chief's Super Bowl win excited me, their victory dimmed with my surprising wins. I wish I had a video of the games. I chuckled when I overheard one of the players say, “I knew Janetta was serious. She concentrated and was quiet.

The picture below is the poster my cousin made up for me before the tournament. FYI: We didn’t "kick butt"
, but fun was had by all.

                              


WRITING NEWS:
This month I'm getting busy. The editing has begun on my latest novel. Yeah!!!

Until next time…

Blessings!!!


Janetta Fudge Messmer - Author of Christian Comedy

“Turning Life Into Comedy”